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It is rare and hasn't happened for a while, but life finally took me by surprise. My friend went bouncing around Europe this past summer and said she found a guy for me. At first I was skeptical. I mean really, what are the odds that some random guy she met in a European country, three thousand miles away, is my bashert? But she insisted, "You never know." So began an email relationship that spanned three months. And slowly, I started to be convinced that perhaps she was on to something. I was getting this really great vibe. His personality was jumping off the computer screen. It didn't matter that I hadn't seen what he looked like or vice versa, what mattered was that I sensed we had chemistry. That's an ingredient that seemed to be missing from so many of my recent dates that I began to despair.

Then low and behold I logged on to my email one day to find that he was coming to New York. Possibilities kept whirling in my head. What should I wear? What should I say? Will we get along and what if I don't like him in person? There were so many questions. There were just so many variables that my mind couldn't process it all at once. My brain started to crash and I started to put it all in perspective. It's one meeting, a first date like any other. My synapses stopped firing and I was able to take control of myself.

Finally, D-Day…he arrived in NY. Clearly, his visit wasn't solely prompted by his desire to see me, so he other things on the agenda. I didn't get to him until the end of his trip, for two hours before Shabbat. What is two hours? If you think about it, two hours is a second of your lifetime, yet the quality of this time was unparalleled. I must admit that I've never had a great date, one where I walk away feeling that a future is possible, until now. All my questions and concerns were alleviated. And I had such a good time that I am going to use an adjective that is so rarely applicable to dates-it was perfect. Perfection is such an unattainable quality. I never thought it existed, but this one meeting has challenged my previous belief system. That is not to say he is a perfect man, because clearly that does not exist. But what was perfect was the chemistry. I couldn't find one thing wrong with him. Not one iota. Usually I come home to matchmakers saying the ubiquitous: "He's very nice, but not for me" or "He's not this" or "He's not that." Yet I thought he could be for me. It's such a scary thought. I started to question why I was scared of something good and I still don't have an adequate response.

But like all good things they must come to end. As quickly as he entered my life, he was gone in a blink of an eye. I started questioning whether it happened at all. Perhaps, it was all a figment of my imagination and I took a trip down the rabbit hole. Anything is possible. All I know is that I had a good time and he had a good time. (I made sure to go to a third party to verify that fact.) The only thing standing in our way is 3000 miles. I've seen long distance relationships work before. I have really great friends who are examples that it's possible, but at least they lived on the same continent. I gather that he is not willing to make the effort, but should he after two hours? Is two hours something to stake so much of an investment. And am I crazy for being so willing to take a chance? All I know is that the lines of communication are still open and I am leaving the door ajar. The rest is in Hashem's hands…

About The Author
Sarah J. Pollack is single and living in Manhattan. "Single in the City" is her compilations of the frustrations of Jewish singles in the community.